I’ve been there. An overwhelmed, confused, and scared new practice owner who is terrified of failing. Those feelings led me to making some big mistakes that in retrospect seem so obviously senseless now. You will make mistakes, but you don’t have to make the same ones I did.

One: Letting clients dictate your schedule. When I first started out, I was regularly working until 9pm under the false assumption that everyone will need evening appointments. Yes, some people need evening appointments, but not all people, and you don’t need all the people — you need enough people. You do not…


When the pandemic hit, every therapist I know suddenly couldn’t keep up with all the inquiries from incredibly anxious and depressed people who were having difficulty adjusting to this new way of life. We were all managing the challenge of feeling like we have to expand our capacity to serve all those in need, the perception of scarcity that frightens us into taking more clients than we can really handle (or the wrong fit clients), and the reflex we have to reduce our fees and sacrifice our own well being. These are all feelings I know too well. …


You’ve heard the buzzword, but you’re not alone if you’re wondering why you’re not making lasting change in your mental health after taking a vacation, going to that yoga class, or taking the “mental health day” your boss recommended.

I’ll never forget when a friend of mine, who was a resident physician at the time, told me her attending gathered up all the residents in a room and announced that they all had to figure out a way to be “less tired.”

We’ve all heard from our friends, bosses, and maybe even our therapists, the empty promise of self care…


Time and time again, I’m doing good work with a client until their medical provider intervenes and tells them that CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) is the only thing that works. Then the client comes to me, feeling duped, and asks why we are not doing CBT. I can’t even count the number of times a client’s primary care doctor or even their psychiatrist has undermined the therapeutic relationship or gains made by poisoning the minds of individuals into thinking that there is only one kind of therapy that works. **Disclaimer, sure, CBT is in fact right for some people, but…


As a straight, cis woman, the idea of proposing marriage to a man had never crossed my mind — that is, until, I met my equal.

Proposal equality is a movement you’ve probably never heard of, and neither had I. Embarrassingly, I had never even thought about it — not even as a self described feminist therapist. That’s just how internalized the gender roles can be. Disempowerment is almost synonymous with womanhood, and a recent Washington Post editorial argued that the idea that only a man can push a relationship forward in straight partnerships is disempowering to both genders.

At…


You are in such a powerful position when you’re single. One of the most beautiful things about being single is that you are starting from scratch and have the opportunity to make more intentional decisions about who you bring into your life. Every. Single. Date. Is. A. Fresh. Start. It’s an opportunity to play, to be the woman you want to be, to call someone out on their bullshit instead of pretending it didn’t happen and wondering how you ended up with another controlling asshole six months later.

Yes, I’m a therapist, but I’ve been exactly where you are. I’ve…


Insurance can be a huge barrier in finding the right therapist. My previous post explained why many therapists won’t take insurance, which makes it seem like there is a shortage of us. I didn’t even mention the fact that insurance requirements dictate your treatment plan and diagnosis, which deserves its own post and is a disservice to the client.

Although you’d think having insurance means you have better access to care, that’s not necessarily the case. Every therapist I know who takes insurance has a long waitlist. The insurance game is actually to create many barriers for both patient and…


Every month I receive dozens of inquiries from women like you who are looking for a therapist. Not only am I hearing how hard it is to find a therapist — but once you conquer finances, scheduling issues, specialties, etc., how do you know the therapist is actually the right fit for you?

Navigating credentials can be confusing and intimidating. Should you go to a psychiatrist, a PhD, a counselor, a psychotherapist, and what’s a PsyD?

The truth is, none of it really matters (although I’m going to explain credentials below). While you want to make sure the person is…


It always cracks me up when people ask for a referral to a “really good” therapist as if anyone wants a just okay one. There’s finding the right fit, but how do you know if someone is “good” and what is that worth?

Contrary to popular belief, therapists are not rich (especially if they take insurance)! In fact, Salary.com reports that private practice therapists in the Seattle area make slightly more than public school teachers! But therapists are part of what’s known as a “gig economy” — a free market system in which the opportunities are temporary in nature (think…

Rachel Gabrielle, MA, LMHC

Psychotherapist & Pop Culture Savant

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